LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS
Friends
Let me add the benefit
of my time as a student and then resident in UK Living in Lagos now. The first
thing that I discovered UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of
them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves-including the children of
millionaire amongst them. It is the norm over there-regardless of how wealthy
their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign
students did the same-except status conscious Nigerians.
I also watched Richard
Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my
amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class-even
when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a
billionaire in pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children
from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in UK. No
other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of
the Prime minister of the UK. He travels in BA. And the same goes for the
Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.
If we want to produce
the desired changes we have been praying for from our children on behalf of our
dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard
so they can stand alone and most importantly be content, and not having to
“steal”, which seems to be the norm these days.
“30 is the new 18yrs”,
which seems to be the new age for testing out the world in Nigeria now. That
seems to be an unspoken but widely accepted mind set among the last 2
generations of parents in Nigeria.\
At age 18, a typical
young adult in the UK leaves the clutches of his/her parents for the
University. Chances are, that’s the last time those parents will ever play
“landlord” their son or daughter except of course the occasional home visits
during the academic year.
At 21 years and above
or below, the now grown and independent-minded adult graduates from University,
searches for employment, gets a job and shares a flat with other young people
on a journey into becoming full-fledged adults.
I can hear the echo of
parents saying, well, “that is because the UK economy is thriving, safe,
well-structured and jobs are everywhere?” I beg to differ and I ask that you
kindly hear me out. I am a UK-trained Recruitment Consultant and I have been
practicing for the past 10 years in Nigeria. I have a broad range of experience
from recruiting graduates to executive director level of large corporations. In
addition, I talk from point of view of someone with relatively privileged
upbringing.
I often get calls from
anxious parents, “my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job,
can you please assist!?
Over parenting is in my
opinion the greatest evil handicapping the Nigerian youth. It is at the root of
our national malaise. We have youth population of over 10 million of who are
being “breastfed and diapered”well into 30s. Even though the examples I have
given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be
observed from everywhere in Nigeria. Wake up mum, Wake up dad! You practically
love your children to death! No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have
society of young people who have been brought up to expect something from
nothing, as if it were their birth right.
Take a moment and think
back to your own time as young man/woman. What if someone had kept
spoon-feeding you, would you be where you are today? No tree grows well under
another tree. Children that are not exposed to challenges don’t cook well. That
is why you see adults complaining, “My
parents didn’t buy clothes for me this Christmas”. Because of the
challenges new faced in our youth, we are where and what we are today. This
syndrome-“my children will not suffer what I suffered” is destroying our
tomorrow.
Anyone who stops
learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays
young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.-Henry ford. Hard work
doesn’t kill. Everything in Nigeria is going down, including family settings.
It is time to cook our children, preparing them for tomorrow. We are
approaching the season in Nigeria where only the RUGGED will survive. How will
your ward fare?
If the present generation of Nigerian pilots retires, will
you board a plane flown by a young Nigerian pilot, if trained in Nigeria? People now have first class, who cannot spell GRADUATE or read an
article without bomb blast! Which way Nigeria! Which way Nigerians! Is this how
we will ALL sit and watch this economy SINK?
God help us in this
Country!
from the school of money by pastor olamide o. Emmanuel
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