letter to nigerian parents

LETTER TO NIGERIAN PARENTS

Friends

Let me add the benefit of my time as a student and then resident in UK Living in Lagos now. The first thing that I discovered UK-born, white, English undergraduates was that all of them did holiday or weekend job to support themselves-including the children of millionaire amongst them. It is the norm over there-regardless of how wealthy their parents are. And I soon discovered that virtually all other foreign students did the same-except status conscious Nigerians.

 

I also watched Richard Branson (owner of Virgin Airline) speaking on the Biography Channel. To my amazement, he said that his young children travel in the economy class-even when the parents (he and his wife) are in upper class. Richard Branson is a billionaire in pound sterling. A quick survey would show you that only children from Nigeria fly business or upper class to commence their studies in UK. No other foreign students do this. There is no aircraft attached to the office of the Prime minister of the UK. He travels in BA. And the same goes for the Royals. The Queen does not have an aircraft for her exclusive use.

If we want to produce the desired changes we have been praying for from our children on behalf of our dear country, then please, please let’s begin now and teach them to work hard so they can stand alone and most importantly be content, and not having to “steal”, which seems to be the norm these days.

“30 is the new 18yrs”, which seems to be the new age for testing out the world in Nigeria now. That seems to be an unspoken but widely accepted mind set among the last 2 generations of parents in Nigeria.\

At age 18, a typical young adult in the UK leaves the clutches of his/her parents for the University. Chances are, that’s the last time those parents will ever play “landlord” their son or daughter except of course the occasional home visits during the academic year.

At 21 years and above or below, the now grown and independent-minded adult graduates from University, searches for employment, gets a job and shares a flat with other young people on a journey into becoming full-fledged adults.

I can hear the echo of parents saying, well, “that is because the UK economy is thriving, safe, well-structured and jobs are everywhere?” I beg to differ and I ask that you kindly hear me out. I am a UK-trained Recruitment Consultant and I have been practicing for the past 10 years in Nigeria. I have a broad range of experience from recruiting graduates to executive director level of large corporations. In addition, I talk from point of view of someone with relatively privileged upbringing.

I often get calls from anxious parents, “my son graduated 2 years ago and is still looking for a job, can you please assist!?

Over parenting is in my opinion the greatest evil handicapping the Nigerian youth. It is at the root of our national malaise. We have youth population of over 10 million of who are being “breastfed and diapered”well into 30s. Even though the examples I have given above are from parents of considerable affluence, similar patterns can be observed from everywhere in Nigeria. Wake up mum, Wake up dad! You practically love your children to death! No wonder corruption continues to thrive. We have society of young people who have been brought up to expect something from nothing, as if it were their birth right.

Take a moment and think back to your own time as young man/woman. What if someone had kept spoon-feeding you, would you be where you are today? No tree grows well under another tree. Children that are not exposed to challenges don’t cook well. That is why you see adults complaining, “My parents didn’t buy clothes for me this Christmas”. Because of the challenges new faced in our youth, we are where and what we are today. This syndrome-“my children will not suffer what I suffered” is destroying our tomorrow.

Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.-Henry ford. Hard work doesn’t kill. Everything in Nigeria is going down, including family settings. It is time to cook our children, preparing them for tomorrow. We are approaching the season in Nigeria where only the RUGGED will survive. How will your ward fare?

If the present generation of Nigerian pilots retires, will you board a plane flown by a young Nigerian pilot, if trained in Nigeria? People now have first class, who cannot spell GRADUATE or read an article without bomb blast! Which way Nigeria! Which way Nigerians! Is this how we will ALL sit and watch this economy SINK?

God help us in this Country!

 from the school of money by pastor olamide o. Emmanuel